Does this stuff happen to other people?

I stayed in bed until roughly 3pm today. This is because I've had pyelo all week which prevents sleep because you wake yourself up spiking or breaking a fever or needing more pain medication. It is also because I felt like it and enjoy spending the day in bed. When I finally fumbled for my phone I had eight (8) messages and Facebook messages asking if I was dead. This is what happens when you get a regular job: people expect you to develop adult sleeping habits.

I finally got up and made coffee and took diclofenac, which I've graduated to, but what is this shit with taking it only twice a day? It's wonderful stuff, but after half a day I'm re-reading the label, like maybe the thing changed to "as needed" or something.

After a cup of coffee and enough time for the back pain to start receding, I felt prepared for a shower. Apparently I was not, because I note that I now, although clean, have one shaved leg.

This is because halfway through my shower the fire alarm went off so I had to jump out and fuck with it. Then because I didn’t punch in my code ENOUGH TIMES the fire truck screeched up so I had to wave and say “NO FIRE! NO FIRE!” and sign a bunch of shit stating that I was not in fact hiding a fire in my house.

After all that, would YOU start up a second shower just to shave one leg? I didn't think so.

So my question is, does this stuff happen to other people and they are just intelligent enough to be quiet about it? Or is it me?

UPDATE, several minutes later: Banjo, my fawn pittie, just brought the on-call phone to me. It had been charging on my nightstand and she apparently got caught up in the cord. Clearly she thought THAT MEAN BLACKBERRY WAS CHASING HER and ran in afraid of it. After examining the phone for dog damage (and finding none), I felt proud that even my pets run away screaming from RIM products. Snicker.

The crazy dog food lady returns

I've been down for the count with a kidney infection this week. I mention this both to get sympathy, because I never gave people enough sympathy who had kidney infections and in fact I've never been that sick and in pain my whole life, and to sort of gloss over the point I'm about to make, notably that I LOST AN E-MAIL. I would have probably posted anyway about it, but now I sort of have to because it's LOST.

I don't know how I even did that. If I wanted to remove all traces of an e-mail from Gmail, I don't think I could. You can always find an e-mail. They lurk in spam or trash or somewhere in an old dusty corner. Yet, Norco and sleep deprivation allowed what normally cannot be done. Fortunately, I can reconstruct it because it came in the middle of the night when I was trying to suffer quietly and not wake up my irritatingly soundly sleeping boyfriend, so I spent a lot of time trying to to figure out what the hell it was about.

The e-mail was from a dude named Scott Henderson and said something very near to "My wife is dying from lymphoma as a nurse I would appreciate it if you would take down her name from your website."

Obviously I was first stuck on the grammar. She's dying as a nurse from lymphoma? Does that matter? Or, he, as a nurse, would appreciate it if I removed her name? Or did he mean that because I'm a nurse I should do him a favor?

Then I got caught up in ethics. If you're an asshole, do you stop being one just because you get really sick (I finally arrived at "no," on grounds that we ALL know we're going to die of something, odds are it will involve being sick first, and we're still assholes on a regular basis)?

On then did I wonder who the hell he was talking about. Normally you'd include whose name you wanted taken down. This necessitated a search of the entire blog for "Henderson," and I came across the crazy dog food lady again. If you, like me, have totally forgotten her trollery and dedication, see this recap.

Tanja, I'm sorry you're dying of lymphoma, and I actually feel even worse for you because I can only assume that you were such a dick to so many people that you've set your noble husband, Scott, on the task of e-mailing ALL THOSE PEOPLE and asking them to take your name down so you won't be remembered as the crazy dog food lady.

However, given that you were just freaking creepy (I mean, digging up my divorce license, accusing my ex-husband of rape, and "contacting the authorities" is right next to creepy in the Blog Troll Handbook I assume you penned, with, I hope, better and clearer grammar than your husband uses) and went to so much trouble to threaten me, I decline to polish up your memory. Claim it, sister. Say it after me: "I was a blog stalker."

Change Your Attitude, Change Your Workplace | Blog @ Online LPN to RN

...it is truly difficult to change your attitude when you are tired, overworked, and surrounded by negative people who are also tired and overworked. Still, here are some ideas to counteract a negative workplace, starting with yourself.

Things are getting pretty hairy at a lot of jobs lately. Here are some ideas for what individuals can do to make a change.

Huh? Communication tips

In my world, there are four basic communication possibilities with patients: statements, demands, questions, and requests. Prodding the patient to clarify which is intended simplifies interactions considerably, especially with kiddos.

  • Statement: "I have a headache."
  • Demand: "Give me medicine."
  • Question: "What causes headaches?"
  • Request: "May I have medicine?"

Labeling communications helps tremendously. Even adults often do not have a point when they start talking, and labeling what they're saying helps them to formulate one.

I'm amused by this constellation of communication habits I have because after I work around a group of kids for a while, I start hearing my own words parroted back from them ("I know, I know, that was a statement!").

As a typical example, consider the 12-year-old boy with behavioral issues and an inability to communicate with any degree of respect. He walks up to me and yells, "Nurse X forgot my goddamn Tylenol!" My emotional reaction is, "Don't walk up to me and start yelling about something another nurse did!" But I've figured out a truly workable system for teaching these kids how to communicate better, and it reduces frustration all the way around.

In this case: "OK, that's a statement. You've given me information." This is usually initially followed by more of the same ("I TOLD him I had a headache, and he SAID he would bring me something, and he forgot!"). At first, this step can last a long time ("You're still just giving me statements. Do you have a request?").

Eventually the kid learns that "Can I have some Tylenol?" is the way to get the job done.

They learn. You just have to help them label statements and demands versus questions (needing information) and requests. Things go better for everyone.

I'm surprised at how many people, even most adults, speak in subtexts. It's no wonder communication is difficult. They'll tell long stories from which I'm supposed to guess what they want or need. Sometimes when directly queried they have no clear idea what the goal of the communication is. Most memorably, my old boss four times removed brought me in once and told me the same story four or five times. I finally asked her if the visit was purely informational or whether she was asking for further input or had a request for a behavior change from me. The conversation ended there, and I learned a valuable lesson about the importance of, shall we say, aiding our opponents in constructing their own arguments.